The Lighthouse Hawaii magazine has started a special column since October 16, 2016 issue titled "May I Speak Up? by Masako Nashimoto". Here Nashi offers her observations and opinions about the world we live in.
Lighthouse誌では2016年10月16日号より、新コラム「梨本昌子のちょっと言ってもいいかしら?」が始まりました。Nashimoto & Associates社長の“Nashi”こと梨本昌子が、彼女独自の観察と意見と共に、ハワイで頑張る皆さんへ厳しくも熱いエールを贈ります。
According to a thesis that I read recently, “goal that you set on New Year’s Day is very unlikely to be achieved.” While 52% people are confident that they would achieve, only 12% out of them actually do. Here are some tips for achieving your goal:
- Write down what you want/need to do.
- Set goals for the next two years.
- Set a deadline.
- Plan backward from the final goal.
- Promise to yourself, talk to someone about the goal
The goal should not be overwhelming, but proceed with positive thinking to achieve. May your wish for the New Year come true.
We now see many people using “Biki,” sky-blue bike, which is a bike share service launched by Bikeshare Hawaii, an NPO. While it is wonderful that many people are leveraging the new system, it is also important for drivers to get used to it. Since we hardly saw bikes in Honolulu prior to the service, drivers are not used to sharing the road with bikes, who can be unpredictable sometimes. We need to think about concept of “sharing the road,” as the road belongs to everyone.
What we also need to be aware of is the new “Distracted Walking Law,” which is a new regulation that prohibits the usage of smartphones when crossing a road. “Smartphone zombies,” who use one’s smartphone while walking, do not pay attention to their surroundings, as their eyes and ears are deprived by their smartphones. This carelessness could harm you and people around you, it could lead to a traffic accident or worse, a traffic fatality.
Let’s also share “Safety Information” with each other and have a safe life in Hawaii.
Last month our company coordinated a student educational & cultural exchange program for junior high school students visiting from Japan to meet with students in Hawaii where we arranged and hosted all the itineraries in Hawaii. It was the third year in a row for us to work on this project so the trusting relationship with the hosting schools had already been established.
Amidst the program however, two Japanese residents visited totally out of the blue, and started an irrelevant meeting with the coordinator from Japan. Moreover, they joined the program despite our declination as the visiting school is located on a military base and requires ALL visitors to register well in advance.
I wondered if they were just overly independent or if they just do not know how to behave while traveling overseas? I just feel blessed that we completed the project without any problems when all the well-prepared & pre-approved plans may have been jeopardized by the sudden unapproved arrival of last minute visitors.
Even in Hawaii, where many Japanese live, you must have an experience or two, where you received an expensive invoice for an unsatisfying service after a long wait.
I had nerve-wracking medical emergency issues twice recently, and every time I had concerns or inquiries, I needed to ask doctors many questions until I fully comprehended the situation. Though I thought I must have been an annoying patient for them, one of them told me “I used to not be fond of Japanese patients because they would say bad things behind my back without asking me any questions beforehand. It’s great that you let me know your concerns and inquiries up front so that I can address any issues you may have – Thank you.”
Even if you are not good at speaking English, you should be brave enough to speak up.
You’re happy without any worries about family or finance, but you feel your life is boring? Life can be enjoyable if you repeat reflection and improvement every day. We can keep these 4 things in mind to improve:
- Try 3 new things every day.
- Try something setting a high bar.
- Look for someone to talk to.
- Keep your diary.
Most sparkling people have many touch points with people and society through various activities such as volunteerism. We need to nurture our own “leadership capability.” Please try making an effort, as “happiness doesn’t come walking to us by itself.”
I volunteer as Board Vice Chair/Co-Secretary of Visitor Aloha Society of Hawaii (VASH), NPO, whose mission is to help international tourists when in need, accident or incident while vacationing in Hawaii, with the hope that they come back to Hawaii in the future. With the high ratio of Japanese having incidents in Hawaii, many times day or night I need to stop what I am doing and rush to the site of the incident whenever I receive a call from whoever needs me.
Recent frequent incidents include stolen passports, cash, and luggage/suitcase (entire family’s belongings) from a trunk of rented car while at the beach or shopping until hotel check-in time. They often ask, “How can this happen?” or say, “This would never happen in Japan. Japan is so much better”. Such thinking should never be an excuse to assume it would never happen in Hawaii as this is considered “naïve” thinking. Unfortunately, this thinking that “Japan is safer, therefore better” also makes the Japanese disliked while in Hawaii.
There are many reasons & behavior that can make Japanese visitors disliked in Hawaii community:
- Uniformity - like to be the same as everyone else.
- Detached - Indifferent to politics.
- Do not understand the good of Japan.
- Work-oriented without humor.
- Care too much about what others think and do not share real thoughts or feelings.
We need to be aware that being naïve can also make Japanese virtue misunderstood or misinterpreted.
Many think “being disliked” is not a good thing, but did you know that “being afraid of being disliked” can deter your self-growth? Japanese tend to favor standing in line with everyone else not to be pushed down due to one’s strong character. However, that makes them “ordinary = no character” and they would be soon forgotten by people.
Per Alfred Adler, a famous psychotherapist, people are afraid of being disliked due to 3 reasons:
- Lack of confidence.
- Lack of aspiration.
- Strong obsession for not to be disliked.
Life is a journey and “being disliked” is kind of an initiation in the growing process. In this age when people’s values are diversifying, you should throw away your idea of wanting to be “normal,” be true to yourself and live with curiosity and courage.
One of Japan’s leading pharmaceutical manufacturing companies conducted a survey of business professionals in Tokyo, 20 to 59 years of age with a theme “Do you feel tired?” & the reason for your tiredness.
As a result, 80% of the respondents answered that they were feeling tired & the top 2 reasons were:
- Relationships at work (44%).
- Contents of work (40%).
In response to “What kind of boss’s words can make you tired the most?”, the following answers were on top 3:
- It’s such a common sense.
- You can’t do that easy work?
- Didn’t I tell you before?
Management needs to know how their words can make their employees tiredness, even if unintentionally. Not to ruin relationships, let’s tell them how thankful you are for what they do.